Category Archives: DART

Anti-Racism SMART Goal Workshop

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Upcoming Dates:

Offered through Common Ground Healing Arts. Register for the 6 week online course with them.

Goal: For people with Racial Privilege to identify their own anti-racist work based upon individual risk assumption and access to resources.

Please read these posts and the three following exercises before attending the workshop in order for you to get the most out of the discussion. To be added to my email list: Register here.

RISK: Read the Calculating Risks post, and reflect on what risks you feel most ready to take on.
RESOURCES: Read the Identifying Non-Monetary Resources post, and begin your own resource list
SMART Goal: Read what a SMART goal is and be ready to apply those lessons to your own indvidual goals. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/SMART_criteria

Calculating Risks in Service of Equity and Justice
Identifying Non-Monetary Resources and Wealth
DART: White Vulnerability
Consent for Non-Intimate Relationships and in Anti-Racist Work

Toni Barskile has been Black for 58 years in which she has attended prep schools in New Jersey, mastered White-approved “standard” English, figured out how to be perceived as “non-threatening” to members of the White establishment and teaching survival/ computer/ critical-thinking skills to Westhaven residents. Toni also works with the dialogue on race subcommittee on media relations, attends White Feather presentations sponsored by Trinity Episcopal Church, and provides web development/design assistance to the Truth Commission Ad Hoc Planning Group of the University and Community Action for Racial Equality. 

Dolly Joseph has been White and lived in Central VA all of her life. Her ancestors colonized lands of the Moneton and Cherokee peoples in the Appalachian Mountains; her family’s generational wealth comes from the exploitation of Enslaved People of African descendants near Calypso, North Carolina. Dolly is an educator and community builder and was once named one of the “4 under 40” women leaders in Charlottesville. Now that she’s no longer under 40, she’s petitioning for a new honor of “5 under 50” to be started. 

Toni’s superpowers include being able to call White people out on their ish without making them cry and the ability to identify structural racism in everyday situations and ways to dismantle it. Dolly’s superpowers include slicing to the heart of the problem, finding order and pattern in chaos, and getting people to do the thing they didn’t even know they wanted to do. Together, they will facilitate so that we will collectively be more ready to smash white supremacy.

Identifying Non-Monetary Resources and Wealth

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One of the ways that people with greater privilege distance themselves from accountability in injustice is to focus on their personal financial instability in this Capitalist society. It’s true that the system is broken, and many of feel stressed and strapped. However, many of us are also doing substantially better than people in poverty. Black people living in poverty deal with the intersection of racial discrimination and economic hardship. Many people do not feel financially stable, yet have unrecognized resources that allow them to access food, shelter, and security. Because of our class segregation in this culture, affluent people do not recognize the barriers that lack of economic access creates. It is HARD to survive our system without these resources that we may take for granted.

Access to these resources means that we can both extend the use of the resource to Black, Brown and Indigeneous People, and use it to subvert and smash the status quo.

Here are some examples of resources that you may have and not recognize. You may have other resources not listed. These resources are not a given for many people, especially Black, Brown, and Indigeneous People. Imagine the barriers that would you would face if you did not have ready access to some of these assumed resources. This list is based upon professional class norms. Use your own life and experiences to generate your own resource list.

Assets
Working/maintained car
Health Insurance
Working Internet
Computer
iPhone and plan
Salaried Job
Ability to set/negotiate work schedule
Paid Leave

Stability
Government Issued ID
Tax returns
Records
Family-owned House(s)
Health
Clean air/water/earth due to location of manufacturing plants, waste sites
Network
Legacy at college
Membership in Associations, Fraternal Order, Clubs		Finances
Credit Score
Credit Card
Credit History
Bank Account(s)
Able to pay and be reimbursed
Discretionary money
Rich relatives
Savings 

Education
Diploma
Degree

Knowledge
“Normative” Behavior of restaurants
Travel

Identity
Family photos
Family tree
Family story
Common name
Get through airport security easily

Space
Space to grow garden
Ability to be in nature
Distant neighbors
Storage
Own room
Skills/Abilities
Literacy– high grade level reading
Navigation of internet resources
Access to power/management structures

Consent for Non-Intimate Relationships and in Anti-Racist Work

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I was looking to find a quick article to link to about consent, but pretty much all of them had to do with sex, so I am writing quickly, and may need to revise. Tell me what is unclear or wrong. Consent and its complement, setting of boundaries, is critical in healthy relationships. White Supremacy, Exploitation, and Racism thrives when we ignore boundaries, and ignore the concept of consent. We ask consent of people we perceive to be equal and important to us. We fail to ask consent when we lack respect for another person’s humanity. Practicing consent is critical for dismantling the interpersonal structures that underly racism.

Asking for consent in practice:

  • Ask before tagging a person in photos or your posts. Identifying people in photographs can endanger all aspects of their life. Tagging someone in a post puts them on the spot, may tokenize them, and require them to take on the emotional labor of reading and/or responding to content that is triggering/traumatic
  • Check in regularly during and between conversations with friends about whether it’s okay to have potentially triggering conversations. If they say it’s not, respect that boundary, and find another outlet for that processing. Don’t make their boundary about you. They may be tired. They may have limited time. It may not feel good to them.
  • Offer, don’t insist. If you want to do something with/for someone, ask if they want that good, service, connect, amplification, whatever. There are many reasons why people may not want something, and it may be out of your experience why they would not. Don’t make your desire to gift become a burden.

If you have racial privilege, you must understand that Black People in America are NOT SAFE. You will not receive and do not deserve trust or consent if you do not center the preservation of Black Life, including their emotional, psychological, financial, and physical health. It is not your job to become a paternalistic protector of Black Lives. It is your work to create space for Black People to have autonomy and self-determination. Black People know best how to preserve Black Life. Those of us who are not Black have the duty to support access to the resources to preserve that life.

This work would not be possible without Toni Barskile.

DART: Identifying Resources and Relationships

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As homework in preparation for class two of DART, participants made lists of all of their resources (ranging from skills to property, assets, finances) that they have access to, and all of the relationships with Black people they have. These lists were for private reflection and to prime them to think about their own place in the world. Because thinking about race is difficult for many white people, we don’t. It’s easier to maintain plausible deniability about white supremacy if we don’t investigate what structures our lives. The maintenance of  white supremacy is not “other white people”, it is us, unless we activate to restructure our own lives to disrupt this status quo. 

So much of what we see as anti-racist work is geared toward white people. Calling in and calling out white people can be helpful, but without accompanying work supporting Black People, Black Work, and Black Excellence, it is merely white people interacting with white people, maintaining a segregated society that is centered on whiteness. 

The homework of listing resources and relationships was in preparation for individual work on creating a plan to support Black people. Let me be clear. This is not in preparation for “doing onto Black people”. This is in preparation for deepening relationships with Black people so that there is a pathway for you, as a white person, to share available resources with Black people. This naturally occurs in your existing relationships. When you research grants, you forward to people who may want to apply. When a job opens at your work, you share the application with people you know are a good fit. When you think of two people who are doing complementary work, you introduce them via email. When you are in relationship with only white people, you are doing these small daily tasks only for white people. When you know more information about Black people, when you know what their needs, wants, and aspirations are, you can opt them into your daily life. I say opt in, because I always ask for consent. “Please let me know if you don’t want to get these grants.” “I understand if you are too busy to meet someone new. Feel free to say no.” “This seems like something that would be a fit. If it’s not, please feel free to ignore it.” 

While you know that you are intentionally focusing on supporting Black people, you don’t need to announce it. And it’s not random acts. It’s observing, and listening to what Black people say they want, and being responsive. It’s offering, not forcing.

This work would not be possible without Toni Barskile and all of the other Black Thinkers who have led the way.

DART: White Vulnerability

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Here’s a true thing that feels absurdly difficult to talk about. White people do not have enough authentic relationships with enough Black People. We know it’s true. Why is it so hard to say? An authentic relationship with a Black Person is just like an authentic relationship. It’s all of the things. It’s not just getting a meal together. It’s the joyful things, right? It’s the love and laughter and giggling and relaxing. It’s also the anger, and the reconciling, and the sorrow, and pettiness, and hurt feelings. This is the hard stuff about relationships. With an interracial relationship you add in the intersection of race, and power dynamics, and privileges. White people are uncomfortable even thinking about our relationship to racism, prejudice, privilege, and power; we don’t want to do the internal work to hold ourselves accountable, and so we don’t do the external work to have a genuine relationship with a Black person and so we don’t even try. And worse, we talk about our Black Friend, and how she said it was okay to be racist. 

My advice to white people, particularly white women, is NOT to suddenly intrude onto Black people and think that they want you as their white ally friend. They probably don’t. You’re probably not going to be a good friend, yet. I don’t remember when this popped into my head, but recently I thought, “White people sure need to work on being likeable.” Likeable is NOT being nice; it’s being present and authentic in a relationship. White people need to trust Black people enough to be their best authentic selves. I think unexamined fears and anxiety cause well-intentioned white people to display a range of unpleasant emotions and actions when interacting with Black people.

There are so many different kinds of relationships– as many kinds as there facets of our personalities. Some white people in Charlottesville seem to think that the only way to have a relationship with a Black person is over racial justice activism or talking about race. It seems so elementary to say, but Black people have fully formed lives. To expect a Black person to talk about racism with an unknown white person is a traumatic act. To reduce a Black person to only their racial identity is a traumatic act. I can’t give you a list of what Black people like to talk about, because Black people are not a monolith. But I can tell you this, from my lived experience, Black people like the full range of dumb, boring, pop cultural, esoteric, oddly specific things that you do. Again, it seems basic, but if you’re trying to develop relationships with people, probably avoid saying stuff like “I wouldn’t have thought you’d like that…”, or “Huh, how’d you’d find out about that?” I do think discomfort and anxiety leads to saying dumb things. I feel like there are people who are saying “But I don’t do that…” If you aren’t, who are these white people saying dumb stuff? I’ll tell you, sometimes it’s me. 

There’s a balance in moving through the world. I try really hard to not say hurtful or ignorant words, but I also accept that I sometimes do. White people hate to be vulnerable or wrong– that’s a part of white supremacy/fragility. If breaking down white supremacy involves me looking dumb for the cause, I’m good. White supremacy manifests itself in personal relationships in white people having to dominate and make the decisions or always sounding right or in authority. They pick the restaurant– the kids come to play at the white household– They head the committee– White people still hold the power. Developing an authentic relationship requires being vulnerable. White people becoming vulnerable is devastating to white supremacy.  Anti-racist vulnerability does not look like dumping all your feelings onto a Black person. Anti-racist vulnerability means asking for support or help, asking for accountability, ceding control, apologizing, asking permission. Anti-racist vulnerability looks like respect and trust. 

I can only speak for myself, but I don’t think my anti-racism work is legitimate if I do not have deep authentic relationships with Black people. I don’t know that I trust myself enough to know what institutions need to be smashed without someone to yell, “Hey, Dolly, not that one!!” If I don’t have mutually trusting relationships with Black people, then there is no accountability for my anti-racist work.

This work would not be possible without Toni Barskile.